Have you ever entertained the thought of committing suicide? I hope not. Did you ever think that being obese is equal to committing suicide slowly? I have. What a morbid thought.
Let’s face it. We all know how obesity affects the body. Diabetes, high blood pressure, stroke, heart condition are the most common problems we think about. How about the part of our bodies we don’t think much about? Our knees and backs, for instance, have to carry our excess weight. Our feet have to put up with the pressure of us on top of them, and we make our feet travel distances carrying a heavy load all day long. Poor body parts! They sure have a heck of a time dealing with us. How insensitive are we?
Sometimes, I can’t help but wonder what the hell’s the matter with me that I don’t lose weight and keep it off. I have actually asked myself, “Linda, are you trying to croak at a young age? You do realize everyday you neglect your health you are taunting the fates!”
Needless to say, I don’t always follow my own advice, but I do try to do better than I was doing before, and I am so much more aware of what I am doing when I am eating. With all this awareness, you wonder how come I am not doing better than I do? It is because I have an addiction to food, and I battle with myself every single day. And it is not because I think I am invincible. I don’t. As a matter of fact, I actually worry if I will die prematurely because of my weight.
So which way is it? Am I trying to commit a slow suicide, or am I in constant denial, or am I in denial when I want to eat and committing a slow suicide sub consciously? All I know is I have to get my act together because the fates may not care why I am overweight. Instead, the fates may decide on quick heart attack. Then what?
No! That is not how my life is going to go down. I refuse to die from being fat. When my time comes, it will because I got old and sick, and not because I am fat. So, I guess I better lose weight so being fat cannot be held against me. I refuse to commit suicide slowly by obesity!
Until we meet again, this is Linda Misleh Wagner, Future Former Fatty.