I have had a thought I wanted to share with you. In this country, we live by the premise that majority rules. So here is what I have been pondering. If majority rules, and nearly seventy percent of the population are considered over weight, then thin people should be striving to be us. Thin persons are in the minority, yet we all want to be thin. Whatever happened to majority rules?
Imagine if majority rules decided that everyone should love to eat, and excess weight was trending, just think about how much of our lives would change. It would be mind-blowing. Ready for the shockers? Here they come!
Let’s start with the grocery store. Fatties are very self-conscience about what they put in their grocery cart; especially once they unload their items onto the counter when they check out. Fatties think everyone is watching what they are buying. Pay attention to the conversation the fatty has with the cashier. Fatties will somehow work into the conversation that the ice cream, the cookies, the candy bars, and the pizza rolls are for their grand kids coming over for the weekend. They feel redeemed when the cashier rings up their Weight Watchers lasagna dinner. The fatty will state loud enough for anyone interested that the diet dinner is for the fatty. Mind you, if the fatty is too friendly and talks about her life too much to the cashier, the cashier might remember the fatty’s grand kids live out of state, which will lead the fatty to lie that the grand kids are in town visiting. One fattening white lie after another is used to cover up the addiction.
How about fashion magazines? If majority ruled, the models would be fat, and strutting their excess rolls to the masses. Imagine a Victoria’s Secret catalog featuring fat models wearing skimpy lingerie. A fatty with significant rolls may look nude if her rolls are covering up the panties. A thong on a fatty may not be seen at all, yet she is wearing it.
How quickly would men buy the swimsuit addition of Sports Illustrated if the magazine were filled with fatties in bathing suits? I would venture to guess the magazine would sell out faster since being fat is the majority.
Airplane seats would be much wider with longer seat belts because the pilots and the flight attendants would be fat because majority rules, and everyone wants to be in the popular group.
Bullying would be in reverse. Fat kids would pick on thin kids yelling at them to go eat a cheeseburger. Of course, bullying in any form is not acceptable.
If everyone lived by the majority rules system, Sumo wrestlers would be our highest paid athletes. Baseball and football would take longer to play because fatties run slower and have to stop to catch their breath.
Let’s not forget reality shows like the Bachelor and the Bachelorette. Hot tubs would have to be enlarged hugely to accommodate the fatter contestants. Instead of romantic dinners for two, the restaurant would be an all you can eat buffet. Running toward one another and jumping up to wrap your fat legs around their fat bodies might result with both people on the ground trying to stand up.
Now let’s address healthcare. Perhaps if majority ruled, doctors and nurses would have the pressure to be a living example of a healthy human taken off them. Science would develop medicine to serve fatties much better and keep them healthy despite their fatness.
Majority rules would change the clothing industry. Instead of designer clothes geared to the size six to twelve woman, department stores would be filled with clothes for the size fourteen to thirty-six women, and the department for slender women would be teeny-tiny like the women’s department for fatties is today. Lane Bryant and Catherines would cater to thin and small instead of big and tall women.
I cannot imagine majority rules when it comes to obesity will ever take over the world. Our bodies are just not meant to be healthy as a fatty. I guess that means we have to face the facts, lose weight, get healthy, and join the minority. It kind of sounds like reverse discrimination, but it is the reality if we are to live a healthy life.
Until we meet again, this is Linda Misleh Wagner, future former fatty.